HIMYM S4E2: "I will eat your hand!"

“The Best Burger In New York”

Marshall waxes poetic about the best burger in NY, which he had at a small restaurant he discovered when he first moved to the city and could never find again. Regis Philbin guest stars as a celebrity whose photo is on the wall of the restaurant. He doesn’t remember where the restaurant is either, but he attacks Barney when the poor boy approaches him to ask about it. In the end, they discover that Robin knows the burger joint, and they all experience the best burger in New York. Meanwhile, Barney tries to convince Marshall to take a job with his company’s new acquisition, Goliath National Bank. Even though Lily points out that Marshall just left a corporate job and is not about to take another. But of course, he does.

This episode was pretty pointless as far as the overall story arc goes, but it did lead to Marshall getting a job, finally. And because watching this episode on the CBS website was pure torture, I had a hard time keeping track of the best bits. Needless to say, Regis Philbin calling Marshall “Lurch” and Barney talking about how he loved the burger so much he wanted to take it home and put on some Terence Trent d’Arby for it were just two of many great moments.

Supernatural S4E2: "Bobby, you're awesome."

“Are You There God? It's Me, Dean Winchester”

Being a girl with a religious studies major, I really like this season so far. We open with a scene of Olivia, a hunter, being attacked and murdered by ghosts. Meanwhile, Dean still refuses to believe in angels and/or god. Sam does believe, and even Bobby says nothing but an angel could have ripped Dean from hell. Dean is frustrated: “I don’t like being singled out at birthday parties, much less by God.” Sam replies, “Well, God wants you to strap on your party hat.” Man, do I love this show.

The boys read up on angels. Dean wants pie. On his way to get pie, Sam sees Ruby. She is terrified of Castiel, and warns Sam to watch himself. Sam replies that he’s not afraid of angels. He also forgets the pie, much to Dean’s consternation.

When Bobby tries to contact Olivia, they discover her bloodied corpse and learn that all of the hunters nearby are also dead. They figure out that a ghost killed Olivia, and moment later Agent Henricksen’s ghost attacks Sam, bitter and full of blame. Dean saves his little bro just in time.



As the episode continues, Bobby is attacked by two little girls who were apparently eaten by a monster while he stood on the other side of the door. Dean is attacked by Meg, who is the most interesting of the ghosts because she reminds us that the boys didn’t recognize that she was a human possessed by a demon. I had a flashback to Bobby’s disbelieving, “You boys can’t tell?” When the Winchesters did finally get around to exorcising Meg’s demon, the reason the poor girl died was because the brothers had thrown her out of a window earlier that week. So unlike the other ghosts, Meg’s death kind of was their fault.

Anyway, all of the ghosts are people that our favorite hunters couldn’t save, and they’re trying their damnedest to prey on that guilt. Oh, and Meg has a brand on her hand. Unable to fight off the ghosts, Bobby takes the boys downstairs to his panic room, which is made of solid iron walls coated in salt. It’s pretty awesome.



The gang has a debate about the existence of god. Dean can’t get behind the idea – there is no rhyme or reason to the world, good people suffer, how can god sit back and watch, the usual. After some brief research, Bobby finds that the brand on Meg’s hand is the mark of the witness. The ghosts were forced to rise. The mark figures into a little ancient prophecy known as Revelation, and is a sign of the apocalypse.

How can this not be the final season?

Back upstairs, Henricksen appears to Dean and reveals that, at the end of Jus In Bello, they didn’t all die in a flash of bright light – Lilith tortured them for a good 45 minutes first. This time it’s Sam’s turn to do the saving. The boys fend off ghosts while Bobby does a spell to release them. In the end, Castiel comes to see Dean, who complains that his guardian is a little late to the game. Castiel reminds him that angels are not protectors – he is a warrior, a soldier. (Just like Dean, ahem). The rising of the witnesses is one of 66 seals, broken by Lilith. Once the last seal is broken, Lucifer walks free. Dean sasses Castiel, but is sobered. So this is why “god” has sent his “angel army” to earth? Yikes!

“Show some respect,” Castiel commands. “I dragged you out of hell, and I can throw you back in.”

ANTM Cycle 11: Wicked Edition

THE RUNDOWN
Annaleigh is freaking out about being in the bottom two last week, and Hannah tells her to stop throwing herself a pity party. It’s almost as though Hannah is trying to make herself unpopular. In their lesson, Miss Jay teaches the girls to runway walk at a bowling alley. None of them are any good. Back at the house, Clark and Lauren Brie have a whispered conversation about how it’s time for Isis to go. Meanwhile, Isis chats about how women are intimidated by her. McKey says it’s because Isis “does girl better than most girls.”

THE CHALLENGE
The girls walk in a fashion show for Jeremy Scott. The catch is, they have to do it blindfolded. But it’s not as bad as it seems, because it turns out they can see through the blindfolds, although their vision is hazy. The winner will get to choose two friends and do an “advertorial” for 15-year-old Russian designer Kira Plastinina in Seventeen magazine. The loser will go no further in the competition. To my extreme disappointment, nobody falls off the runway. Annaleigh finally brings confidence to the table, and does wonderfully. Samantha flips her dress up at the end of the runway even though the designer told her several times not to do so. Joslyn wins, and chooses Sheena and Isis to be in the shoot with her. Hannah loses, and is eliminated.

THE SHOOT
The shoot takes place in the pool at the ANTM house. Nigel Barker is the photographer. The girls are shot with the lower half of their faces underwater, so this shoot is all about their eyes. Clark, Marjorie, Annaleigh, Sheena, Lauren Brie, and Samantha do well. McKey, Joslyn, Isis, and Elina do not. Elina is particularly bad – she is lackluster, cannot come up with any poses, and complains about being “stuck.” Isis is incredibly uncomfortable because she’s in a bikini again and is afraid that her tape will come unstuck in the water.

DURING PANEL
Isis did poorly, was too concerned about other things to pay attention.
Elina was the weakest of the bunch, they expected more.
Marjorie looks wicked and nightmarish (in a good way), pushed it to another level.
Annaleigh is stunning, has the whole package, her photo is to die for.
McKey’s eyes are intense but her hand is awkward and “looks like a club.”
Lauren Brie looks devilish and fantastic.
Sheena usually looks serene but here she is intense, she is fun to shoot.
Clark was the only one who smiled with her eyes, she shocked the judges.
Samantha has creative poses, was one of the best but one of the worst on the runway.
Joslyn looks terrified, she can’t swim and she should have told Nigel that right off the bat.

After guest judge Jeremy Scott trounces Samantha for her runway performance, Tyra uses her to make a good point about modeling: it’s about the designer, not the model. Models represent designers, not themselves. Samantha is in tears.

IN PRIVATE DELIBERATION
The judges are surprised by Elina’s poor performance. They think Isis is trying too hard to be “one of the girls” and is afraid to stand out. The other girls all receive praise, although Paulina disagrees with everyone else about Marjorie’s photo.

The first photo is Clark.
The bottom two are Isis and Samantha.
Isis has lost her spark and is afraid to stand out.
Samantha takes gorgeous photos but the designer she worked for was insulted and disgusted.
Isis is eliminated.

Fringe S1E3: "Am I required to keep him alive?"

“The Ghost Network”

I don’t know if I was just in a bad mood after the painful hour I spent watching 90210, or if it was the fact that my mother called ½ way through and I missed some stuff, but the central story didn’t do much for me tonight. Basically, some guy named Roy is drawing tragedies that he sees in his head, and then they happen. Walter figures out that he is tapping into the “ghost network,” which is of course one of his old projects, and Roy was a test subject. Walter explains something about how spectral waves transmit information, and Roy’s brain is picking it up. Blah blah blah, they stop a bad guy.

And now, some thoughts on the characters and their relationships:

Although it’s corny, I can’t wait for the moment that Peter finally calls Walter “dad.”

Walter, who we learn is self-medicating with homemade psychotics, tells Peter that “lack of commitment” is his problem. I feel like he said a similar thing in the last episode, so I assume it is significant. Walter continues to be the best character on this show. John Noble is a fantastic actor, and I love Walter’s dichotomy– he is a genius who can perform brain surgery, but he struggles to answer a cell phone.

When Peter and Walter are in a restaurant, Peter notices a guy following them and confronts him. The guy, who is taking pictures of Peter, tells him that he was supposed to inform them when he got back into town. When Walter asks what happened, Peter says something innocuous about how the guy was harassing the waitress. Walter gives him a knowing look. WTF is Peter’s secret? It better be good.

Peter says his mother is “a story for another time.” My guess is something’s up there.

Olivia goes to Nina at Massive Dynamic for help identifying a chemical compound, and casually comments how strange it is that everything leads her back to MD. Nina’s counter? “I could say the same about you.”

Broyles takes the evidence they find to Nina, who then uses it in her quest to extract information from John Scott’s body. Both Broyles and Nina exist in quite the little gray area. What is their true relationship?

This show really needs to step it up with the character of Olivia. She has all the personality of a blank piece of paper.

RELATED NEWS
It’s called suspension of disbelief, people: Popular Mechanics debunks Fringe’s science.

90210 S1E5: "Not everyone is a ho-bot like you."

“Wide Awake and Dreaming”

And 90210 continues in its quest to be the most boring show on television. The implied sex from the commercials is part of the SCHOOL PLAY!

Annie is Adriana’s understudy for the school’s version of Spring Awakening, and Ade is missing rehearsals because she’s under a lot of pressure and is a drug addict. Harry catches Annie and Ty making out backstage, so Debbie has a poorly scripted sex talk with her daughter. The next day, Naomi joins the Annie & Silver at lunch for a chat. When did this happen? The girls tell Annie that Ty “has done everyone” and she’s next. Ethan and Naomi are blissfully happy. Silver tells Annie she’s not ready for sex.

Much like Cindy Walsh in the original 90210, Debbie’s character is kind of pointless. Harry is upset because he doesn’t want Annie to make the same mistakes that he made. I have to say I was wondering about this – they really glossed over the whole “I just found out I have a kid with another woman” storyline. Weird.



Before the play, Adriana’s mom reveals that she has invited a bunch of agents to see her daughter. Buckling under the pressure, Ade gets high and Brenda won’t let her perform. Annie takes her place. I’ve never seen Spring Awakening, but based on the fact that two teen characters have implied sex onstage and one song goes on about “the bitch of living” I do not believe it would be performed in a high school.

Annie asks Dixon for the condom he’s been carrying in his wallet for four years. You have to wonder about its efficacy. She then runs into Ethan, who has brought her flowers. She drops the condom, and Ethan tells her she cannot sleep with Ty. “Wouldn’t you rather save yourself for someone who cares about you?” he asks. “I tried that, it didn’t work out,” Annie sniffles with a meaningful look. Bitch please! These kids have known each other for, like, a month – if that.

At the hotel, Adriana shows up at Ty’s door. She tells him that Annie left the play with Ethan, and she saw the two of them making out. Ty is sad. Lemme guess what happens next. Downstairs, Silver finally attacks Dixon, and they make out on a pool lounge chair. Dixon is bummed that he gave away his condom, but Silver says it doesn’t matter because they’re going to take it slow.

Annie shows up to find Adriana in a towel and the shower running. Ade says that if Annie wants to wait, Ty is “just rinsing off.” Annie runs away. Adriana goes into the bathroom, and Ty isn’t even there. That’s pretty cruel. Annie goes home, puts on a happy face for her parents, and then collapses in tears in her bedroom.

** UPDATE
There is no fucking way Spring Awakening would be a school musical.