90210 S1E7: Hollywood Forever

“I also like tacos, welcome to school.”

The problem with being a highly organized blogger is that when you stock up on promo photos in advance, you have to deal with the fact that you are going to ruin surprises. But anyway, 90210 FINALLY stepped it up a notch this week. There was drama, there was intrigue, there was death and dismemberment. It was a marked improvement.

First: the Naomi/Adriana story. Adriana is now a full-blown cocaine addict. Naomi, who used to “dabble” in coke, recognizes the signs and offers to help. But Principal Harry has called the fuzz, and cops burst onto the scene to search everyone’s lockers. In a moment of pure stupidity, Naomi takes the coke from Adriana and runs, only to get caught flushing it down the toilet. She later explains that she assumed her daddy could buy her way out of it. Not so. As the episode continues and Naomi realizes the amount of shit she’s in, she begs Adriana to fess up. Ade agrees to meet Naomi and her parents at the lawyer’s office. Bitch please! I can’t believe Naomi fell for that. Naturally Adriana doesn’t show, and as the episode comes to a close we see an unconscious Adriana surrounded by paramedics as Naomi simultaneously leaves a furious message saying that Adriana is dead to her. Next episode: bring on the guilt!

Second: the Ryan/Kimberly story. New student Kimberly arrives at West Beverly, and she is sassy and cute. (She’s also Sue from Life As We Know It). And I know that she’s a brat in class, but Ryan is shockingly rude to her considering that he’s a teacher. She flirts with him, and though they have the same personality and make the same jokes, he shuts her down hard because, you know, he’s an adult and she’s not. But surprise! Kimberly is an undercover cop involved with the sting Harry has arranged (which, coincidentally, Ryan doesn’t believe in, and fights Harry on). Interesting developments could be afoot…

Third: the Dixon/Silver story. It’s Silver’s half-birthday, so she invites a bunch of people to a showing of Psycho at the Hollywood Forever cemetery. Dixon doesn’t like horror movies. Silver invites him over for “something he’s never done before.” And, side note, she’s painting the interior walls of the house black. Kelly’s gonna be pissed! Anyway, the “something” is “watching a horror movie marathon” and when Dixon falls asleep Silver gets upset, all “I tried to share something I love with you and you were a dick about it.” Blah. They make up. This storyline did give Dixon a chance for some amusing lines, though, which beefed up his character a bit.

Fourth: the Annie/Ethan story. Seven episodes, and I’m already over it. Annie and Ethan are paired together on the requisite “take care of a mechanical baby in health class” storyline. They go to the movie with Silver and Dixon, each assuring the other that it’s not a date. Finally, after a bunch of hemming and hawing, Ethan says it can’t be a date because he wouldn’t… and leans over to kiss her. They get within a ½ inch of each other before a scary movie moment causes the audience to shriek and they spring apart. I would prefer a little more buildup to them getting together. Where is the angst?

Fifth: the Harry/Debbie/Tracy story. Tracy has hired a private investigator to find their son. And she kisses Harry, who is horrified. The end.

This episode had some great little moments, but I think my favorite was when Annie finds her computerized baby crying in the bathroom corner, where she has left it. Debbie says, “Nobody puts baby in a corner,” and she and Harry giggle like children. Annie and Dixon stare at them blankly. It was one of the moments that could have been terrible had the children laughed too. As it was, it was pretty cute.

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