Gossip Girl: Desperately Seeking Serena

Gossip Girl – Desperately Seeking Serena
As panic sets in for the juniors preparing to take their SATs, Serena has the added stress of dealing with the return of Georgina Sparks, someone from her bad-girl past. Meanwhile, Jenny decides to get a boyfriend, thinking this will elevate her social status.

The biggest news from this SAT-themed episode is the budding romance between Nate and Vanessa. I was never a fan of the Dan/Vanessa romance. They were both too nerdy and it just seemed too easy. I am loving the Nate/Vanessa love connection! One of the best moments was when Nate took Vanessa on a surprise morning date to the SAT test site. Budding filmmaker Vanessa felt that she didn't need college and therefore decided to not take the test. Nate encouraged her to consider her options and take the test anyway. He even gave her some fresh pencils for the test. Awwwww…

This mysterious Georgina character is back in Serena's life. She is apparently a manipulative drunk who is total bad news. She has some huge dirt on Serena and her reappearance in Serena's life causes a rift in her relationship with Dan. Instead of confiding in him she turns to her creepy new brother Chuck. Trouble is definitely brewing in Dan/Serena land.



Jenny decides to get a boyfriend to help her standing with the richies. So of course she needs to find a rich boyfriend. When scouting the streets for her new beau she bumps into a cute dude walking dogs. This guy doesn't meet her standards since she is looking for a “king, not a court jester.” He gives her his number anyway and when Jenny sees him later getting out of a fancy car she decides that it could work out.

She is grounded due to last week’s dress theft scandal, therefore Rufus won’t let her make a date with dog boy (a.k.a. Asher). Never being one to follow the rules, Jenny makes a lunch date anyway and when Rufus finds out he gets hella pissed and makes her cancel. Asher ends up bringing hot dogs over to the Brooklyn loft to surprise her.

The episode leaves us with Georgina running into Dan in Central Park (meeting him for the first time). She gives him a fake name. That girl is up to no good! We also learn that next week, we are going to find out the secret Georgina is holding over Serena, and someone will be dropping the “gay bomb.” I'm not sure who is going to come out of the closet. I would like to think it is Chuck since he was wearing the most fabulous red trench coat all episode, but my bet is on Serena's brother Eric.

Hey, hi, how are you, I brought you a juice box.

Reaper – Coming to Grips
Andi sees Sam behead a demon and thinks he’s killed someone, so Sam makes a deal with the devil. Meanwhile, Ben gets married under unusual circumstances, and Tony reappears in his true demon form. This episode was chock-full of guest stars, and packed a ton of plot into less than an hour.

Something sinister flies through Seattle. In Sam’s apartment, he tells Andi over the phone that their date is on schedule. Moments later, in full demon form, Tony attacks Sam, asking why he betrayed them. Sam says the devil tricked him. Tony apologizes, and then helps Sam cook for Andi. This show is becoming very Buffy-esque, especially when Demon Tony says that Bon Appetit magazine is the only thing that keeps him sane. Tony plans to rebuild his army and conquer the devil. Right then Andi shows up and overhears part of their conversation, but when she walks in Tony vanishes.

Sock and Josie are back together. Uck. Ben is sad that he doesn’t have a girlfriend. But he has a list of what he wants in the perfect girl, and he’s aiming way too high.

This week’s soul, Jack, works at a sperm bank and uses his own sperm to impregnate all the women. It’s Javier from Felicity (Ian Gomez)! Since last week the souls are suddenly mingling with the living, which I don’t really get. This week’s vessel is a scythe. Andi sees Sock and Sam playing with it, and then becomes curious when Sam cancels their lunch date. She follows him and sees him chop off Jack’s head.

Again, Reaper departs from the same old formula. But the more I read, the more I am certain it’s too little, too late. After the commercial break, a headless Jack stands up and starts swinging at the boys. Sam stabs him with the scythe, which takes him back to hell. But Jack’s hand remains behind, and apparently this soul can regenerate. Lucy Davis (Dawn on The Office UK), plays Sara, an employee of the Work Bench. It seems that she likes Ben, and she tells him his standards are not too high and he should keep looking for the perfect girl. She points out that she has none of the qualities on the list, and Ben gives his best puppy-dog look. Perhaps he just might like her back regardless!

Andi punches Sam in the face the next time she sees him, and threatens to call the cops. He begs her to give him 24 hours to explain. Sam puts a note for the devil on the vessel and Gladys kind of makes fun of him for it. Sam tells the devil about the Andi situation, and the devil yells at him for being sloppy. Sam says he can make Andi keep his secret, and the devil says ok but that one day he’ll need a favor. A big, terrible favor. Because he’s an idiot, Sam makes a deal with the devil. Hasn’t this kid learned anything yet?

The next morning, Sara walks out of Ben’s room while the boys are eating breakfast. Ben tells Sock & Sam that he married her because she needed a green card. Later, Sam tells Andi that he’s a bounty hunter for the devil. Naturally, she walks out on him. Not shockingly, the devil knew full well that Andi wouldn’t believe Sam, and suddenly he gets all scary-quiet-angry and says he will take care of Andi if Sam doesn’t.

Sam is desperate to track Andi down but she won’t answer her phone. Sock and Ben tell him to relax because they have kidnapped her and locked her in the trunk of his car. Sam gets into the car and folds down the backseat armrest to talk to Andi, and she attacks him through the little hole. I like Andi more in this episode than ever before. She’s kind of awesome.

Sam decides to “scare” the truth into Andi and takes her to see Tony. The boys wrestle her into the cabin, where she almost rips off Sock’s nipple, and then Tony turns full-on demon right in front of her. Not surprisingly, Andi runs from the cabin. Ben asks if Sock left the keys in the car and, as Andi peels out of the driveway, Sock responds, “It’s possible.”

Tony drops the boys off at home. Sam is frustrated that every time he gets close to Andi, something happens. Tony gives him a big speech about how love is worth any sacrifice. I kept expecting something terrible to rush up and kill Tony during this speech, but nothing happened.

The next day, no one can find Andi. The boys go to the hospital to trap the soul, and the devil appears. He has locked Andi in Sam’s trunk again and says that Sam has one more chance to get it right. When Sam lets Andi out, she finally says she believes him and swears not to tell anyone. But this is more than she can handle, and she starts to walk away. He yells that he loves her. In tears, she turns back and says she’s afraid of him.

Dualla from Battlestar Galactica (Kandyse McClure) plays Cassidy, a nurse at the hospital. And Ben realizes that she has all of the qualities on his list. I was not expecting that; I thought Ben would realize he liked the imperfect Sara. When Sock & Sam corner Jack, he cuts off his hand and lets it escape. Sock goes after the hand while Sam stays with Jack, who turns the tables on him. Fortunately Andi chooses that moment to walk into the room, and after a struggle the scythe ends up in her hands. Jack goes to attack her and runs straight into the scythe, getting sucked into it before her eyes. With not even enough time to comfort her, Sam is forced to leave a stunned Andi behind so that he can track down the other Jack.

Ben tells Sara he met the girl of his dreams. But it’s obvious that Sara has loved Ben all along, and she says he can’t date anyone because they’re married. Andi and Sam make up, and everyone is happy. But in the end, the devil steals Sam away to Tony’s cabin, and it turns out the favor he wants is for Sam to infiltrate Tony’s new circle of insurrective demons.

Naturally just as I start to really enjoy this show it’s going to get canceled.
Great quotes were not just from Sock this week!

Sam, talking soothingly to a locked-in-the-trunk Andi:
“Hey, hi, how are you, I brought you a juice box.”

Tony, just before he reveals his true form to Andi:
“Please don’t pee on the carpet, I just put it down.”

Sam, upon learning Sock and Ben have kidnapped Andi:
“This isn’t solving the problem, this is adding a felony on top of the problem!”

After a naked Jack lands on Sock's back, with Ben standing nearby:
Sock: “That was horrible.”
Ben: “It looked horrible.”
Sock: “Did it leave a mark?”

And my favorite, when Sam berates Sock and Ben for not helping him explain the truth to Andi:
Sam: “Where the hell were you guys, I was dying over there.”
Sock: “I had to wait for the chili cheese fries.”
Ben: “My wife called.”

During this episode I saw yet another Veronica Mars alumni in a bad commercial. First Wallace sold Hot Pockets, now Hannah is selling KFC.

Woah, goat turd on the floor, is that new?

How I Met Your Mother – The Goat
Barney breaks the “Bro Code” in a matter involving Ted, and has to deal with the consequences.

On Ted’s 30th birthday, we finally see the story of the goat (first mentioned in season one episode “Milk”). Robin and Barney wake up together. They decide to pretend that nothing happened, and they’re kind of cute together. Barney has a terrible time pretending and finds it difficult to be around Ted. He is super awkward and keeps thinking that everyone knows.

Barney tries to tell Marshall his secret, but Marshall covers his ears. So Barney tosses a bowling ball that Marshall is forced to catch, and takes the opportunity to tell Marshall that he slept with Robin. Marshall is horrified. Barney hires Marshall as his “lawyer” to study the “Bro Code” and prove that he did nothing wrong. It’s a testament to the writing that this new, contrite side of Barney didn’t feel “wrong.” Barney is unscrupulous, even towards his friends (i.e. making Ted grow a mustache he knows will look ridiculous) – but never about anything really important. Shopping at Sky Mall when he’s depressed is totally in step with his materialistic character.

Lily brings a farmer and his goat into her classroom and when kids ask if they’ll get to see Missy the goat again, the farmer says he’s having her slaughtered. So Lily brings her home, with a plan for Animal Rescue to pick her up on Monday. Marshall arrives at the apartment, acting horribly awkward, so Robin instantly knows that he knows. She threatens him, telling him not to breathe a word.

Marshall cannot find a loophole in the Bro Code and Barney is upset because he just wants to feel better. His next move is to show that Ted has broken the Bro Code before, but Marshall proves that Ted has always upheld the code. Marshall tells Barney the only way to feel better is to tell Ted what he did.

Barney picks up Ted in a limo to take him to his surprise party, but tries to take him to Vegas instead, to prove what a good friend he is. He starts to tell Ted that he slept with Robin, but Ted already knows. Turns out Robin was unable to keep the secret. In a flash back, Robin breaks when Ted shows her a picture he has found of the two of them on vacation. She is earnestly repentant, and Ted tells her he’s not mad. He says the same thing to Barney, but he’s totally lying. Back at the party, we learn that Lily knows too, and she asks if it was amazing and if Barney was “all smooth down there.” Back in the limo, Ted punches Barney in the crotch.

In a suddenly serious turn for HIMYM, Ted tells Barney that he doesn’t want to be friends anymore. He calls a cab, and Barney looks like he’s about to cry.

At the very end, adult Ted starts to tell the story of how the goat locked herself in the bathroom and ate Robin’s washcloth. Then he stops and says, “Wait, Robin wasn’t living there during my 30th birthday. The goat story happened during my 31st birthday.” What?!?!

To be perfectly honest, I do not pay as much attention to the time line of HIMYM as I could. But, in the second season episode “Single Stamina” when Barney’s brother gets married, Robin and Ted slow dance at the wedding. We don’t know exactly where this scene fits into the overall time line, but let’s say it’s roughly 6-8 months after their breakup. The conversation they had with Lily and Marshall before they got up to dance implied that they were not together – Ted says something like “I think I’ll stay a little longer” and Robin says “Me too” – but who knows? That’s the sheer beauty of HIMYM.

The way the Robin-living-in-the-apt info was casually tossed out in the final moments of “The Goat” is indicative of everything I love about the show. What does it mean that in a year’s time, Robin will be living with Ted? Do they just become roommates, or will they rekindle their relationship? Or does Ted not live in the apartment at this future date? And, since we know (or think we know) that Robin is not the mother, does it even matter?

They've changed the rules.

Lost – The Shape of Things To Come
Locke’s camp comes under attack and Jack tries to identify a body that has washed ashore.

What is there to say about this episode that couldn’t be said in 4 minutes? I’ll give you the answer: a lot! It was most definitely a game-changing episode. First off, we get a flash-forward of Ben and Sayid. Now we know that Charles Widmore has something to do with why Sayid is teamed up with Ben later on – he had Sayid’s wife Nadia killed. I have a sneaking suspicion that Ben may have had a hand in that as well, but that will play out later. Sayid is convinced he needs to help Ben assassinate all known associates of Charles Widmore. This week’s flash-forward started with Ben waking up in the middle of a desert wearing a parka with a gun wound in his right arm. Two Middle Eastern gentlemen toting AK-47s ride up to him and act threatening, to say the least. While one of them is searching Ben’s pockets, he suddenly transforms into Jason Bourne, calmly and efficiently ending their lives.

The ship’s “security” guards have obviously made it onto the island since they killed Rousseau and took Alex captive last episode. They make their way into Locke’s camp and proceed to mow down anything that moves. Sawyer is very sneaky and manages to make it over to Claire’s cabin in order to drag her virtually untouched body out of the wreckage of her cabin. Apparently on the island you can launch a rocket at a cabin, reducing the entire thing to burning toothpicks, and if only one person is inside she’ll survive and just be a bit shell-shocked.

The main security guard, Martin Keamy, tries to get Ben to come out of his cabin by holding a gun to Alex’s head. Ben calls Keamy’s bluff and Keamy paints the ground with Alex’s brains. I saw Hitman this weekend so I can assure you I know exactly what happens when someone is shot in the head. If you too would like to know, please rent Hitman because I don’t want to think about that movie ever again. Ben is left in shock, mumbling something about changing the rules. He runs into his secret room and summons the smoke monster, which turns Keamy’s “security” team into pulp. Ben goes over to say goodbye to his daughter, which is a really touching moment and I’ve got to give Emerson props for the way he acted. He made Ben into a very human character in that scene.

Locke and his crew move out. There is some strife, so Sawyer, Claire, Miles, and Hurley decide to head back to the beach to join Jack’s group. Ben and Locke have decided to head to Jacob’s cabin to find out what’s going on. Since Hurley is the only person who knows where Jacob’s cabin is, he is forced to stay with Locke and Ben at gunpoint. While all of this was going down I didn’t get the feeling that Hurley really wanted to go to the beach. I think he wants to stay with Locke and Ben. I may be completely wrong on that guess, but that’s the nature of the show.

The episode started out with Bernard finding the body of the doctor aboard the ship washing up on the beach. The satellite phone was broken, so Faraday rigged it so it could transmit Morse code to the ship. Obviously Jack has suspicions about Faraday and why his group is on the island, and they were confirmed during this episode. Faraday sent a message to the boat asking about the doctor, then lied to the group. But, Jack had Bernard on hand to call him out. The people on the boat said that the doctor was fine and nothing was wrong on their end. The island’s time difference is rearing its nasty head again. Jack violently confronts Faraday about why they are on the island and Faraday admits that rescuing the survivors of Flight 815 is not on their agenda. Jack has had a stomach bug all episode and right at this moment he hits the ground like Mike Tyson when he fought Buster Douglas.

The most interesting scene in this episode occurs during the flash-forward with Ben. He breaks into Charles Widmore’s house and confronts him in his bedroom. Charles has taken the Chuck Bukowski method of sleeping to heart and pours himself a tall glass of scotch to wash away his dreams. Ben accuses Charles of killing Alex, and Charles tells Ben it was his fault. Charles also makes it clear to Ben that the island will be his again. Ben says that because Charles changed the rules by killing Alex, he is going to kill Penny.

• I’m not convinced Rousseau is dead. She seems too tough to go out the way she did.
• I like how the Lost producers were like, “What are we going to do with all these random survivors that walk around and carry firewood and stuff?” and then the another producer is all, “I know, let’s get a bunch of guns and shoot them all and blow some shit up.” I didn’t catch the credits so would someone please check and tell me if Michael Bay directed this episode?
• When Ben finds himself in the desert and doesn’t know what year it is…that’s a telling moment. Now we know that time travel has something to do with everything.
• This episode began with a top shot of Ben splayed out in the desert. The series began with a shot of Jack splayed out on the beach. Hmmmm.
• When they’re playing Risk and Hurley says, “Australia is the key to the whole game.” Am I the only one who gets the sense that may have more meaning than just talking about Risk?

Listen here, chisel chest...

Supernatural – Ghostfacers
Sam and Dean star in a paranormal reality show that takes them to an abandoned estate that turns into one of the most haunted places in the US for one night each year.

Wow. Just … wow. “Ghostfacers” didn’t advance our base story at all, but what a fantastic episode. If you didn’t watch it you absolutely must find it online, because there is no way this post can do it justice.

The episode opens with Harry and Ed (of HellhoundsLair.com fame) pitching a new TV show. They talk about the writer’s strike (ha) and how reality TV is the new thing. Their show, called “Ghostfacers,” follows them as they hunt down ghosts: “We face the faceless, we face the dead.” Seen through Harry & Ed’s cameras, this entire SN episode is set up as an ep of “Ghostfacers.”

First we meet the team: Ed and Harry, who SN fans will remember from season one episode “Hell House.” Their intern Corbett, who saw Ed putting up fliers and thought, “Where do ghosts come from?” Maggie, Ed’s adopted sister. And cameraman Spruce, who is 15/16 Jew, 1/16 Cherokee. (And excellent casting all around). The humor is nonstop, and with the mock-documentary format it’s like I’m watching The Office, but its Supernatural. Crazy.

There is a legend that the Morton House becomes the most haunted place in America every four years, on February 29th. The Ghostfacers team breaks into the house, only to run into Sam and Dean pretending to be cops. Unfortunately, Ed and Harry remember the brothers from their run-in in West Texas, so their little charade fails.

The gang begins to see ghosts reliving their deaths, which Sam explains are “death echoes.” What they can’t figure out is why: none of these people died in the house. Sam & Dean come close to getting everyone out of the house before midnight, but Corbett sneaks back upstairs and gets attacked. In a quick side moment, we learn that at this point Dean has two months to live. Spruce asks if it’s cancer. Digging through the house, Dean finds toe tags for the people whose ghosts they’ve seen. They realize the guy who owned the house, Daggett, was a hospital janitor who took people’s remains home with him. Right then there is a huge surge of EMF activity, and Sam disappears.



Sam ends up in the same place as Corbett, sitting at a table set for a birthday party with a bunch of dessicated corpses surrounding him while Lesley Gore’s “It’s My Party” plays. It’s pretty fucking freaky. The ghost sticks a spike through Corbett’s throat. The gore on this show never ceases to surprise me. Dean and Spruce start downstairs and the door automatically locks behind them, separating them from everyone else. Dean finds Sam, who explains that Daggett was “Norman Bates stuff your mother” lonely.

Upstairs, Corbett’s ghost appears, gasping and tortured. Ed wants to help pull him out of his loop. Harry says that Corbett had feelings for Ed: “You gotta go be gay for that poor dead intern.” Ed approaches Corbett’s ghost and says he loves him, and Corbett snaps out of his trance. At the same moment, Daggett attacks Sam and Dean, but Corbett’s ghost saves the day. This all happens really quickly and is very slightly anti-climactic. In the end, Sam and Dean leave an electromagnet behind to destroy the footage that the Ghostfacers took, thereby preserving their precious anonymity.

In addition to showing the boys cursing up a storm (bleeped a la Arrested Development), this episode was chock-full of fantastic quotes:

Ed, trying to put his foot down with Dean:
“Listen here, chisel chest…”

Corbett, delighted by a compliment from Ed:
“You think I look like Robocop?”

Sam, irritated with Dean:
“Oh, let’s go hunt the Morton House, it’s our Grand Canyon.”

When Dean tries to help Ed & Harry by yelling through a locked door:
Dean: “There’s salt in my duffel bag, make a circle and get inside.”
Ed: “ Inside your duffel bag?”

When Harry explains Corbett’s feelings to Ed:
Harry: “He wanted you.”
Ed: “He wanted me to what?”

Ed & Harry reflecting on their adventure:
“We’ve learned that gay love can pierce through the veil of death and save the day.”